The Don (in bathrobe):
Who do they think they
are?
The media’s tangled with
the wrong man!
No one makes fun of the Don!
Le Spicy Fou:
Darn right.
The Don:
Dismissed! Rejected!
Big-ly humiliated!
Why, it’s more than I
can bear.
Le Spicy Fou (offers remote control):
Fox News?
The Don:
What for? Nothing helps.
Everyone hates me.
Le Spicy Fou:
Who, you? Never!
Don, you’ve got to pull
yourself together.
Gosh it disturbs me to
see you, oh Don,
Looking so down in the
dumps.
Every guy here’d love to
be you, oh Don,
Even those CNN chumps.
No one in the world’s as
admired as you!
You’re everyone’s
favorite guy!
Everyone’s awed and
inspired by you
And it’s not very hard
to see whyyyyyyyyy!
Noooooooooooo oneeeeeeee
lies like the Don,
Thinks he’s spied on
like Don,
Spreads conspiracy
theories as blithely as Don!
How he bullies and
growls he’ll get even,
And he will, sure as I’m
Spicy Sean.
You can ask any Jeff,
Reince, or Stephen,
And they’ll tell you
whose team they prefer to be on!
Chorus:
No one’s rich as the
Don!
Likes to bitch like the
Don!
Tramples on laws and
norms in the ditch like the Don!
The Don (swings around lamppost):
Yes, my tax returns are
so incriminating!
Chorus:
My, what a guy, he’s our
Don!
Give five “Heil Dons!”
Give twelve “hip-hips!”
Le Spicy Fou (shakes podium menacingly):
The Don is the best and
the rest of you are shit!
Chorus:
Noooooooo oneeeeeeeee’s
mad as the Don,
Uses “Sad!” like the
Don,
Wants to sleep with his
daughter as bad as the Don!
For there’s no one so
gross and so lonely.
He’s a narcissist pig,
it’s no lie.
It’s no wonder Mel
stayed in the city,
As she patiently waits
for her husband to die!
No one tweets like the
Don,
No one cheats like the
Don,
Who grabs pussies with
hands so petite as the Don’s!
The Don:
I’m especially good at
retaliating! Sad!
Chorus:
Ten points for our Don!
The Don:
When I was a lad, my dad
showed me no love.
My complexes blossomed
and grew.
So now that I’m old,
I’ve no shame to speak of,
And I’ll force all my
wrath upon you!!!!!!
Chorus:
Noooooooo oneeeeeee’s
orange as Don,
An abhorrence as Don,
Who will ban anything slightly foreign as Don.
The Don:
I use gold leaf in all of
my decorating!
Le Spicy Fou:
Say it again!
Who’s a man among men?
Did we make you forget
You’re the worst
president?
Who’s a super success?
Screw the Muslims! The press!
Ask his minions and
goons who is boss!
There’s just one guy in
charge
And his name is writ
large!!!!
And it’s V-L-A-D....
V-L-A-D-E….
V-L-A-D-I……..
Chorus:
The DON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
