America. Great. Again.

I watched the events of Wednesday’s attack on the Capitol unfold in real time.  I had tuned in to listen to the proceedings in Congress, disgusted as senators and representatives voted to object to the results of our free and fair election.  (Voted to disenfranchise EVERYONE, by the way—not just those of us who voted for Joe Biden.)  I was horrified as I watched the rioters breach the building, but I felt (what I now know to be) a false sense of safety for people inside.  The news correspondent I watched calmly reported as she was shepherded with lawmakers to the undisclosed safe location.  Now, as I watch the horrific videos of the mob menacing and beating police officers, smashing glass, chanting “Hang Mike Pence”, I realize just how close incredible danger came to the people working inside the Capitol Building.  It was a lynch mob deprived of its intended victims.  As I try to internalize the reality that the President of the United States set this violent mob on its march to the Capitol and then refused to provide emergency protection when things got out of control, I am horrified to realize just how dangerous this moment is for our country and all of us.  

There is no equivalence between this mob and the Black Lives Matter protests and riots of the summer, as some on the right have suggested.  The BLM protests were borne of the grief and frustration and helplessness that resulted from watching another innocent black man get murdered by police.  Did those protests at times turn violent and destructive?  Yes.  But they were not egged on by the leaders of “the left”.  Joe Biden did not condone the violence.  

This mob is a class unto itself in American history.  At the behest of the president and loser of the 2020 election, this mob intended to disrupt the proceedings of government at the precise moment it was to certify Joe Biden as president-elect of the United States.  They came prepared with guns, bombs, and zip-ties.  They built a gallows and hung a noose.  They killed a police officer and drove another to suicide.  The twin goals of this mob and its enablers: sedition and terror.

And yet, they practically waltzed into the Capitol.  As many have already commented and as all but the most deluded know, had such a mob been planned and formed by black and brown men, that day would have had a very different outcome.  Riot police would have been prepared and deployed as they were during the BLM protests over the summer.  Countless members of the mob undoubtedly would have been shot.  But the benefit of the doubt is always and only afforded to white men.  We watched the most rotten advantage of white privilege on full display: the permission to invade and destroy.   

It seems almost a poetic summation of all Trump hypocrisy.  Was this the “law and order” they cite?  Do patriots (as Ivanka called them) show love of country by smearing feces in the halls of Congress?  Love is patient, love is kind, it is never rude.  Can we honor “blue lives” and the stars and stripes as they did, by beating police officers with the American flag?  Or is the real way to thank a cop to bludgeon him to death with a fire extinguisher? We watched the literal manifestation of the ways white resentment has hollowed out our ideals and rendered words meaningless.

The mob is just one piece of the existential danger America faces at this moment.  Another, perhaps more enraging component is the mob’s enablers: all those who spread lies about the security of the election, who raised hopes it could be overturned, those who have actively done Donald Trump’s bidding for the last five years and those who passively ignored the warnings of his unfitness, all who carelessly sacrifice norms and traditions of American democracy in pursuit of power.  The Republican Party is irredeemable by its support of President Trump and its complicity in the subversion of American democracy.

How do they not understand the glaringly obvious: that Donald Trump is only loyal to himself?  He will feed any of his followers to the wolves as soon as it benefits him to do so.  Mike Pence—the most loyal servant—literally faced a lynch mob sent by his boss because he refused to abuse his ceremonial role of certifying the results of the election.  Gallows built, noose hung, crowd chanting “hang Mike Pence”.  The crowd egged on by the president, told “we love you” by the president.  And still Mike Pence won’t say the president is unfit to hold the office.  And still Ted Cruz and Josh Hawley and countless others voted to object to the results of a free and fair election.  As Clare Malone (one of my favorite political observers) often says, partisanship is a hell of a drug.  

There is a straight line from the “Unite the Right” march of neo-Nazis in Charlottesville to this mob’s attack on the Capitol, and there is no guarantee the line ends here.  I fear the likelihood of its escalation.  That likelihood is why Trump must be removed from power immediately and all his enablers held to account.  His patterns are known and reliable—every norm he breaks is a crack he eventually tears wide open.  This latest broken norm is the most significant: America’s tradition of the peaceful transfer of power is over.  We are nearing collapse.  If history is any guide, these events can get much uglier.  We must act now if we do not want political violence to become our new normal.

The number one priority of Joe Biden’s presidency must be to shore up democracy. He must boldly and swiftly face the emergency of this moment.  Thankfully he will have the power.  He must use it.

A few ideas how:

• Combat the trend of minority rule by abolishing the electoral college and directly electing the president
• Reform nepotism laws
• Require all candidates to disclose tax returns
• Reform the presidential pardon power
• Grant DC and Puerto Rico statehood
• Statehood would provide insulation from the whims of a vindictive president—the ability to call in its own National Guard, etc.  Events of January 6 and (reaching further back) the aftermath of Hurricane Maria show us that the power to protect Washington and Puerto Rico must not be in the hands of the president.
• Prosecute all those responsible for the attack on the Capitol to the fullest extent of the law.

There can be no unity with traitors.  There can be no forgiveness when there is no sorrow.  We must understand the immediate danger of this moment and hold to account all those responsible for how we got here.  

The President will travel tomorrow to Alamo, Texas to tout the “success” of his border wall.  Do not mistake the significance of the name of that town.  He is emboldened and he will further agitate his dangerous followers.  

Hitler’s first attempt to overthrow the German government—the “Beer Hall Putsch”—was in 1924.  The Nazis failed that time, but they were never stamped out and successfully completed their “revolution” nearly a decade later.  The Holocaust swiftly followed.  It can happen here.  We are watching it happen here.  We must stamp out this evil before it is too late.

Black lives matter.

I’ve always used writing as a way to process my feelings about events around me. I can look back at times in my life when I wrote nearly nothing and recognize I was avoiding issues and feelings I needed to address. I think that’s why the Blob has been so silent recently. To truly process the events in America over the last few days (and weeks and months and years) would be to admit things about us I don’t want to admit. It would be painful and scary and sad.

But whatever I feel now in writing this is nothing compared to the pain felt by those who see themselves, their brothers, sons, and fathers in George Floyd as he gasps for his last breath.

The only thing I can permit myself to feel is shame. Shame that I ever thought racism was a thing of the past. Shame that someone can look at me with the legitimate fear that I could be an Amy Cooper walking my dog. Shame that I know people who will continue to repeat the “bad people on both sides” garbage. Shame that America continues to hold down the people who most embody her ideals. Shame that we are “led” by a man who delights in the inequality and violence.

How can we look our fellow Americans—fellow human beings—in the eye?

All we can do is give. Give money, time, love. We can practice radical empathy toward every person we meet, wherever and whenever we meet them.

We cannot give up America. We cannot give in to anger or despair. Justice will prevail, but not by default. We can only make it happen with discipline and love. Be safe and be smart.

PAY ATTENTION.

(Not gonna be my most clever or eloquent, but feels urgent to post something. I woke up like this.)

Pay attention today to what happens in the Senate today.  I believe the actions taken today—the decision whether to allow witnesses in this impeachment trial—has the potential to decide the fate of this Republic.  (I really do hate sounding so dramatic but I don’t know how else to put it.)  I’m sick of the “history will judge this GOP harshly” cluck-clucking.  History is now.  We have to judge them harshly NOW.  We are running out of chances to preserve the republic.

If the Senate will not call witnesses, if the Senate will not conduct a fair impeachment trial, it waives—it denudes itself of—its most critical oversight power: the check on a lawless president.  When Congress has no power—the people have no power.  You and I have no power.  Congress is our voice.  If Congress cannot perform its checks on the executive branch...we no longer have a president as the Constitution defines it.  We have a man above law.  I wouldn’t expect Donald Trump to know Louis XIV’s “l’etat c’est moi”, but he understands and craves the meaning of that sentiment.

A sham trial “exonerating” the president will only embolden him to continue usurping power.  (How is this not crystal clear—I want to bang my head against the wall.)  

Possible implication: Imagine the President loses the electoral college in 2020, but he and his lackeys cry voter fraud.  He refuses the results and will not give up the White House.  Can we rely on Congress to enforce the results of the election?  Would they remove him?  Could they?  It profoundly saddens me that I don’t have that faith.  

[“Claire, you’re crazy, that’s not gonna happen.” Before the 2016 election, he said: “I’ll accept the results—if I win.”  He tells us who he is all the time.  We have to believe him.  If he was willing to challenge election results WITHOUT the power of incumbency, do we really think he wouldn’t do it with his fat ass comfortably on the White House toilet?  Particularly if leaving office surrenders his protection from indictment?]

I don’t understand GOP senators—isn’t this one of those great opportunities of history to do what’s right?  Why is it so hard? I will never understand the individual cowardice.  Why—WHY—would you rather go down in history as a servile imp to team cruel-ignorant-despot-wannabe-and-gobbly-turtle-man than as a LEGITIMATE AMERICAN HERO??

I can understand the collective cowardice however.  I always think back to that GOP post-mortem report after losing to Obama a second time.  They understood that demographics were scheduled to doom the Republican Party as it currently operated, but rather than adapt itself to our norms and institutions, they decided to keep power by burning the whole thing down.

I remember a conversation I had with someone who couldn’t stomach Hillary, who knows deep down that Trump is trash, but is too stubborn to give any ground.  I listed how I saw Trump as a real threat to the Constitution—our very system of government.  He scoffed at me.  “The Republic will survive,” he said.  “Why risk it?” I answered.  

Evil knows it will lose to good in a fair fight, so it works to gain any edge it can through deceit and trickery BEFORE the fight begins in earnest.  It stacks its deck by taking advantage of good’s faith that everything will be alright, of good’s complacency, of good’s fear that maybe it’s too late.  

We must care.  We must pay attention.

This has been your occasionally scheduled freak-out over the decline of our democracy.  Have a nice rest of your day.

Voting to-do list.

Alright, kids.  We have a critical election on Tuesday.  Here are two things we can do:

1. Vote.
2. Have The Talk with your parents.

The second item applies however you think your parents will be voting.  If you are on the same page, great.  Encourage them and thank them.  But if you disagree, talk to them.  I know it sucks and is way easier not to.  Your siblings may get angry with you and wish you’d keep your mouth shut (may I recommend a time other than dinner?).  But it’s important.  You may not change their minds or sway their vote, but they need to hear your voice.  Tell them you are worried.  Give them reasons why.  Show them evidence.  Don’t resort to name-calling.  Tell them you love them instead.  Donald Trump has split up enough families.  

Maybe they are also troubled by the current climate, but they think we are too far down the path of corruption to make any difference.  They’ve thrown in the towel.  Tell them how strange it is to hear them say such things, when you’ve been so accustomed to them telling you to never give up.  Ask them where we would be if that had been the attitude of their parents in the 1940s.  Tell them you will not give up without a fight, because that is how they raised you and how their parents raised them.  

Tell them what you see of your generation.  I see optimism, inventiveness, and determination.  We have big ideas and big hearts.  We crave the freedom and opportunity that is our inheritance from this great nation—the nation you will hand over to us, even if we have to claw it from your cold, dead fingers.  We will make it new again.  Because you taught us to participate.  We weren’t out there buying those participation trophies for ourselves.  You gave them to us.  You enrolled us in softball and dance and scouts and summer camp.  You taught us to participate because you knew its value.  We learned participation is not just valuable—it is essential.  Healthy society cannot function without it.  Democracy cannot function without it.  

Happy voting, friends.  

Only 2 years ago?  What a wild ride.

Due Process: A Treatise on Entitled Men

There is so much to say about the Kavanaugh confirmation process, and much of it has already been said elsewhere.  (A great example of “If you’re not mad, you’re not paying attention.”)  But something that stuck out to me was the image of a grown, white man ranting his “righteous” anger in front of the United States Senate about the end of due process in America.  Give me a fucking break.

The left-wing rag Merriam-Webster defines due process as:

1

: a course of formal proceedings (such as legal proceedings) carried out regularly and in accordance with established rules and principles

— called also procedural due process

2

: a judicial requirement that enacted laws may not contain provisions that result in the unfair, arbitrary, or unreasonable treatment of an individual

— called also substantive due process

But there seems to be some confusion about what due process is, particularly amongst white men.  They seem to believe due process is their right, and the right of their fellow white men, to get away with anything, their right to succeed in spite of any misstep, any exposed character flaw, any crime.  Of course he deserves this promotion—it’s simply due process.  Amazing how differently due process works for white men than it does for everyone else.  It’s leeway that simply does not exist for others.  

Where is due process for victims of sexual assault?  They can’t (and never have been able to) trust the course of formal proceedings to result in justice.  I don’t see Brett Kavanaugh crying about that.  I don’t see Brett Kavanaugh doing anything about that.  And one might argue that, as a federal judge, he is one of the few who actually can do something about that.

Where is due process for the thousands who are incarcerated because they can’t afford bail?  Where is due process for the unarmed African American men shot and killed by police officers?  Where is due process for their families? Yes, due process is failing many people in America.  But it is not failing white men.  So forgive me when I vomit at the sight of an overgrown prep-school jackass-turned-federal-judge crying about the end of due process in America.  

Serving on the Supreme Court is a privilege, not a right.  Brett Kavanaugh missing out on his dream job isn’t due process failing him—it’s an occurrence many ordinary Americans, disproportionately women, have had to swallow with grace.  “Your resume is very impressive, but this job may not be quite right for you.”  Brett Kavanaugh missing out on his dream job because he tried to rape a girl in high school isn’t due process failing him—it’s his past coming back to bite him.  The Supreme Court confirmation process hasn’t ruined Brett Kavanaugh’s life.  Brett Kavanaugh ruined Brett Kavanaugh’s life.

I believe Brett Kavanaugh tried to rape Christine Blasey Ford.  Regardless of that, I believe Brett Kavanaugh’s behavior yesterday disqualifies him serving on the Supreme Court.  He did away with any pretense that he is not a complete partisan.  He showed he has no composure under stress.  I seriously doubt his ability to remove his own prejudice in ruling on any case.  Rather, I strongly suspect his contempt for “the left” would steer him toward vindictiveness.  There is enough vindictiveness in politics.  Sexual abusers are well represented.  Surely we can do better than Brett Kavanaugh.

#neverforget: A Treatise on Fear and Freedom

After listening to President Obama’s speech (which I highly recommend), I was inspired to dig up FDR’s Four Freedoms speech.  I’d been meaning to do so for a while—it often pops into my head against the constant, reckless fear-mongering by our president and his enablers.  The Four Freedoms speech was FDR’s State of the Union address in January 1941—his message that the Union was preparing for the fight of her life, an existential battle for how humans deserve to live in this world: with freedom of speech, freedom to worship, freedom from want, and freedom from fear.  The surprise attack on Pearl Harbor would happen less than a year later.  

It’s scary how relevant his words are now.  An excerpt:

I suppose that every realist knows that the democratic way of life is at this moment being directly assailed in every part of the world–assailed either by arms, or by secret spreading of poisonous propaganda by those who seek to destroy unity and promote discord in nations that are still at peace.

... 

In times like these it is immature–and incidentally, untrue–for anybody to brag that an unprepared America, single-handed, and with one hand tied behind its back, can hold off the whole world.

No realistic American can expect from a dictator’s peace international generosity, or return of true independence, or world disarmament, or freedom of expression, or freedom of religion–or even good business.

Such a peace would bring no security for us or for our neighbors. “Those, who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.”

As a nation, we may take pride in the fact that we are softhearted; but we cannot afford to be soft-headed.

We must always be wary of those who with sounding brass and a tinkling cymbal preach the “ism” of appeasement.

We must especially beware of that small group of selfish men who would clip the wings of the American eagle in order to feather their own nests. 

How reassuring to read and imagine hearing those words from an American president.  Don’t know what you got till it’s gone, right?

I bring this up today out of anxiety that we are confusing what we should #neverforget about September 11, 2001.  The attacks of September 11th were an evil and cowardly attack on our freedom.  They were meant to inspire fear.  Death by itself can’t destroy democracy—fear can.  Like democracy, fear is simply an idea.  But they are two ideas that cannot live in the same place.

I remember a particular history lesson at Villa.  Our teacher remarked it wasn’t a given that ordinary Americans would stick to the values of democracy in the wake of the stock market crash and Great Depression.  The conditions for fascism seemed riper in a place like Germany, for instance, but we were not immune.  Look at this photo essay from The Atlantic.  These are images of 1930s New Jersey and New York, not Germany.  (Check out that crowd at Madison Square Garden—yuge!)  High-profile Americans like Charles Lindbergh espoused the “America First” Committee, whose stated goal was to keep America out of the war, an intention that sometimes mixed with fascism of its own.  On this day in 1941, Lindbergh gave a speech detailing the three groups he believed were to blame for pushing us towards war in Europe—the British, American Jews, and the Roosevelt administration.  Regarding the second group, he said:

It is not difficult to understand why Jewish people desire the overthrow of Nazi Germany. The persecution they suffered in Germany would be sufficient to make bitter enemies of any race.

No person with a sense of the dignity of mankind can condone the persecution of the Jewish race in Germany. But no person of honesty and vision can look on their pro-war policy here today without seeing the dangers involved in such a policy both for us and for them. Instead of agitating for war, the Jewish groups in this country should be opposing it in every possible way for they will be among the first to feel its consequences.

Tolerance is a virtue that depends upon peace and strength. History shows that it cannot survive war and devastations. A few far-sighted Jewish people realize this and stand opposed to intervention. But the majority still do not.

Their greatest danger to this country lies in their large ownership and influence in our motion pictures, our press, our radio and our government. 

But be assured: 

I am not attacking either the Jewish or the British people. Both races, I admire.

But I am saying that the leaders of both the British and the Jewish races, for reasons which are as understandable from their viewpoint as they are inadvisable from ours, for reasons which are not American, wish to involve us in the war.

We cannot blame them for looking out for what they believe to be their own interests, but we also must look out for ours. We cannot allow the natural passions and prejudices of other peoples to lead our country to destruction.

Back in that history class, I remember thinking how obvious it seemed that remaining true to the values of our democracy would be the only way to defeat fascism.  And I still don’t think that’s my hindsight bias talking.  Democracy and fascism are fundamentally opposed.  Democracy includes all people—all men are created equal.  Fascism excludes certain people.  Charles Lindbergh doesn’t get to exclude Jewish people from an American democracy, as much as he professes to “admire their race”.  When we compromise on which groups of people get to be included in “freedom”, we defeat democracy.  When we compromise on a fundamental belief, it’s not a fundamental belief anymore.  Democracy depends on the word “all.”

Fear and freedom cannot live in the same place.  I believe this essential truth to my core.  You know it too.  We feel most human when we are most free:

• when we can freely and honestly express what’s happening in our brains and hearts, and when we respect others for doing the same
• when we can praise the spirit of life in whatever way makes sense to us, in whatever way gives us true joy
• when our bodies enjoy health and sustenance and mobility, when we can walk and eat and dance
• when we can do all these things with confidence, when we can do them without shame, without being afraid.

Isn’t that when we feel most alive?

That is the promise of America I grew up believing in and loving.  The promise itself is American exceptionalism—the rest is just noise.  When we abandon the promise, we lose what sets us apart, what makes us great—our freedom.

I’ll presume to close with the end of FDR’s 1941 State of the Union:

This nation has placed its destiny in the hands and heads and hearts of its millions of free men and women; and its faith in freedom under the guidance of God. Freedom means the supremacy of human rights everywhere. Our support goes to those who struggle to gain those rights and keep them. Our strength is our unity of purpose.

To that high concept there can be no end save victory.

Raise a glass to freedommmmm

The consent of the governed.

We already know our president is unfamiliar with the concept of consent. “Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything…Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything.”

Fortunately for us, his understanding of the concept is irrelevant to the fact that his government derives its power from the consent of the governed.

Whenever any form of government becomes destructive to the ends of securing the people’s inalienable rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, it is the right of the people to alter or abolish that government.  “Whenever” does not mean only on Election Day.

What aspect of locking thousands of children in cages and camps secures their lives, their liberty, their pursuits of happiness? Many of these children will never see their parents again.  Can’t we see that this abomination jeopardizes our own and our children’s lives, liberty, and pursuits of happiness? To extrapolate from the oft-quoted poem, it doesn’t get better after they come for defenseless children.  We cannot afford this man’s reckless abuse of power to continue any longer.  The president must resign.

His executive order “reversing” the policy of family separation cannot undo the damage done to these children and their families.  If we accept this “reversal”, we cannot undo the damage done to our nation.  As long as Donald Trump remains president, he disgraces the office, and thereby disgraces us.  He governs by our consent.  We cannot consent to this.

If the president does not resign, the Congress must impeach and remove him.  If the gratuitous torture of thousands of children does not constitute a high crime or misdemeanor, what does?  He does not get a do-over for this.  He does not get to try internment camps on children for size.  This is not his Katrina–it is his Waterloo.

Politicians, even a president, have resigned over less egregious abuses of power.  But the call for this president to resign is conspicuously absent.  Why?  This silence is a toxic byproduct of the gradual erosion of norms of political decency.  We are accustomed to our wacky president doing wacky things.  He expects us to grow accustomed to evil as well.  We cannot consent to this.

The marches planned to protest this administration’s handling of immigration must demand the resignations of the president, the attorney general, and the secretary of homeland security.  We cannot trust or expect them to reunite the families they have torn apart or to keep other families together.  They have proven their vindictive incompetence time and again. 

With these protests, we can reinvigorate our democracy.  We together can fix it.  And it is crucial we do so now, a time when democracy is considered “in retreat”. 

In this country, the people hold the power.  We must remind the president and the Congress that they serve at the pleasure of the American people.  And we are not pleased.

Give me your tired, your poor, and I'll take those babies away: A Treatise on the Border Situation.

If we cannot recognize both the cruelty of separating children from their parents at our border and who bears responsibility for this cruelty, I'm not sure we can claw our way back up this slippery slope.  Again I ask my friends and family who voted for Donald Trump: what are the limits of your tolerance for his actions?  Where do you draw the line?  If the tearing of children from their parents does not stir rage in you, what will?  That is not a rhetorical question.  How bad does it need to get?  Because that is what our president is testing.  The American president and his disciples ask—no, they condescendingly expect your partisan fervor to override your natural empathy for that instinctual panic of a child who cannot find her mother.  But the team conveniently provides an out for those of you (presumably good Christians) who hate what is happening to the poor children: they assure you they too, as parents and Christians, hate this abomination, but there is simply nothing they can do to stop it.  The blame falls squarely on their political enemies.  Republicans only control the presidency and both houses of Congress.  The buck stops somewhere else. 

If our president is such an expert negotiator (who, let's not forget, has all the power on his side), why does he need to use real-life, vulnerable children as pawns? This is the genius of Donald Trump, you say.  He’s effectively forcing a conversation.  Many methods are effective, even sanctioned by law.  But that does not make them all moral.  The ends do not justify the means.  This is not some brilliant move of brinksmanship to force Democrats to the table on illegal immigration.  This is only cruel.  Any fool can orchestrate inhumanity in an attempt to get his way.  The strategy is not only despicable, but shortsighted.  Who else has used this strategy?  How did that turn out?

We can even look at this “policy” specifically.  Who else in history has forcibly separated children from their parents?  Nazis come to mind.  Antebellum slave traders come to mind.  I’m no policy maker, but I’d think we could find better role models.  Though I guess we shouldn't be surprised.  Our president has expressed sympathy for Nazi demonstrators before our very eyes. Our attorney general, like his father and grandfather before him, is named after the president of the Confederacy and the man who oversaw the first attack on the Union. Still, emulating those who increase their power by degrading fellow humans seems at odds that old American fundamental “we hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal”.  But maybe the founders really did just mean men, what with "original intent" and all.  Tough luck, women and children.*

Perhaps in the search for biblical justification, Sarah Huckabee Sanders alerted the president to the story of the judgment of Solomon, but he quickly got bored, heard the words "split the baby in half" and thought, "great idea."  Spoiler alert, Don: Solomon neither cuts the baby in two nor blames his murder of the child on the dispute of the mothers.  But in that movie, Republicans of Congress win best supporting actor in the role of the mother who is happy the baby dies.

*THANKS IVANKA

State of the Blob.

My fellow Americans, the state of the Blob is middling to fair.  I know I said I was going to end it, now it’s back, will I end it again…not sure.  I think I’m resuscitating it.  I know, I’m a tease.  (Speaking of resuscitation, did anyone else expect a reference to the Bee Gees while our president got into the particulars of CPR during his State of the Union address?  I sure did.)

I just finished watching the SOTU while drinking wine straight from the bottle.  So there’s a new low.  I had to turn it off as soon as the post-game commentator used the word “Reaganesque”.  Pretty sure the “shining city on a hill” speech didn’t include any “very, very, very, very”s.  To be fair, maybe that dude was using “Reaganesque” to mean “gradually incapacitated”.  Or maybe he thinks “Reaganesque” means “proving one can read”.  In that case, okay, sir, you have a point.  I think we can put to rest the conspiracy theory that Donald Trump does not know how to read.  I am confident if, at the ripe and stable age of 71, the man does not know the words to the Star Spangled Banner, he most likely was unable to memorize the second longest SOTU address in history and therefore must have read it instead.  Bravo.  (It did occur to me they might have rented the Disney World Hall of Presidents animatronic Trump for an evening...did anyone actually see Donald Trump walk away from the podium??  Or did they know we would all turn off the TV in disgust BEFORE a president would typically leave a podium…he could be stuck there…“he” as in “it”…“stuck” as in “bolted to the floor”…this also explains Mike Pence’s periodic gazes of loving admiration…holy moley, it all adds up…cannot think of a single flaw.  New theory: Disney animatronics running the country.  Thank God.)

To close, I will presume to borrow a few Reaganesque words, the last lines of his “shining city on a hill” speech.  If you have time, the whole thing is worth the read.  You can decide for yourself if it bears much relation to the address we heard tonight.

Let us resolve tonight that young Americans will always see those Potomac lights; that they will always find there a city of hope in a country that is free. And let us resolve they will say of our day and our generation that we did keep faith with our God, that we did act "worthy of ourselves;" that we did protect and pass on lovingly that shining city on a hill.

PS, Mr. Putin, tear down this wall!  lol jk love you man. 

A coup in America.

This segment followed by this segment make me about as hysterical as a Fox News host when Barack Obama wears a tan suit.  I feel crazy.  But I think this is incredibly alarming and probably evil shit.  

This is the test of American democracy.

If this White House continues to discredit the FBI, sowing misinformation via their propaganda media arm, insinuating without real evidence that FBI officials were planning subversive activity against the president, we very well may be witnessing a coup—the hostile takeover of the American government by anti-democratic forces and their idiot stooges.

This is what happens in authoritarian regimes—the demonization of the “other”, the undermining of checks on power, the banning of words, the consolidation of that power.  The circumstances are said to be so dire we must put aside the law.

The circumstances are dire, and that’s why we must cling to the law. 

The foundation of our government, those precious values in our Constitution, is under assault.

We, the people, must cling to the law if our leaders will not.

This is the chaos Vladimir Putin wanted when he interfered in our election.  He wants to make a mockery of us, and he’s had definite success.  But his target is not just the office of the president—it’s our whole system of government and society.  He wants the world to see that we as Americans do not value our greatest strength—that we are a nation of laws, and not of men.

If we want to preserve the republic, we, the people, must prove him wrong.

We, the people, must demand our leaders are held accountable to the law.

Congress, representative of the people, must impeach President Trump if he fires Robert Mueller.  The people must demand it.

This is not sexy stuff.  But democracy is destroyed by gradual disintegration from within.  A series of events make up that gradual decline.  The election of Donald Trump was one such event.  The removal of Robert Mueller would be another. 

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I’m not a big protest person, but I will participate if Trump crosses this line.  Consider finding an event near you. 

A message from Sean.

The Blob breaks its regrettably long hiatus with this special message from Sean Hannity.

Stand down, you idiot fucks.  Stand down.

Such moments in history do not often befall us mere men.  The Keurig has wronged us.  The Keurig has burned us.  Your valiance against the Keurig will not soon be forgotten. 

But we cannot continue in such bitterness. Brother against brother, father against son, husband against wife, husband against husband (lol jk, that would be gay and we don’t do that on this show), son against brother against father against nephew, men against single serving coffee machines.  Enough!  What more can the world take?

Again, I say, stand down.

We cannot hallow these grounds.  Frankly, they don’t deserve it.  I call on you to make peace with the Keurig, not because it is easy…but because it is hard.  Also because Volvo pulled its ads and I’m a little afraid to see what you’ll all do next. (Oh who am I kidding—GO SMASH SOME VOLVOS INTO HILLARY CLINTON’S FACE)  (lol jk again, my lawyers are advising me not to encourage this behavior.)

There will be other hills of beans to die on.  This is not our hill. 

You have fought the good fight.  You will finish the race, maybe even all the races.  You have kept the faith.  Know that our God fully espouses our righteous rage.  Is that not the best part of waking up?  But we must return to merely winking at violence, rather than actively stirring the pot.

Press on.